I get a lot of ideas that never manifest as fully realized blog posts. Ok, maybe “fully realized” isn’t the right phrase. “Half baked” is more accurate, but I digress. Anyway, all my posts start as a few words in a digital sticky note, followed by a slow fleshing-out in a text file. If I’m lucky, they finally, hopefully, become reasonably coherent posts.
Most don’t, however. They linger, languish, even, for months and years on end. These undeveloped, orphan thoughts stare at me day after day until eventually I just tune them out. I know I’ll never cultivate them but I just can’t admit it to myself.
So rather than letting these ideas fester and rot, I present them to you. Here are my currently pending incomplete thoughts. Links to any notes I compiled are provided after each summary. Perhaps someone out there can develop them further because, apparently, I sure as hell won’t.
Star Wars vs. Star Trek
The idea here was to create an objective comparison of the two legendary franchises. No subjective interpretation or philosophical discussions, just hard data: box office, advertising, and merchandising revenue, viewing hours, and any other objective measure of success I could imagine. It was easy to find box office revenue for the feature films and I was just getting started on viewing hours, but then I realized the whole endeavor would be far too difficult. How would I determine revenue from advertising? Should I also account for novels, comics, video games, and all the myriad “expanded universe” properties? The data could probably be obtained somewhere, somehow, likely after exhausting research and leg work, but I’m way too lazy for all of that.
View Notes for “Star Wars vs. Star Trek”.
Fox Mulder Ultimate Rant
This one was inspired by an episode of The Simpsons featuring Dana Scully and Fox Mulder from The X-Files. I recalled a hilarious rant by Mulder in that episode which perfectly lampooned his wacky but passionate character. I thought it would be a riot to string together most or all of Mulder’s ramblings about government conspiracy into a single, ultimate rant. I was off to a good start, but it just proved too hard to find enough appropriate quotes and combine them in a sensible way.
View Notes for “Fox Mulder Ultimate Rant”.
Why Burn Notice is Better than Lost
Of all my unrealized ideas this was closest to fruition. It seemed like a very simple premise: explain why I enjoy one television program more than another. I was all proud of myself for coming up with the idea to correlate the differences between the two shows to the contrast between Star Wars and Lord of the Rings. The idea never evolved beyond a few bullet points.
View notes for “Why Burn Notice is Better than Lost“.
100 Reasons to Keep Smoking
I’ve had this idea in mind for years. It occurred to me one day as I lit up while stuck in traffic. I experienced a glimmer of euphoria as my thoughts drifted away from the insufferable delay and toward getting my nicotine fix. Being able to smoke made the traffic more bearable. I started thinking of other good reasons to keep smoking: suppresses appetite, gives cause to carry a lighter which can come in handy, things like that. Furthermore, it seemed like a radical thing to put out there. Everybody talks about how you should stop smoking, so why not be different and propose reasons to keep smoking? At the very least, it might get a rise out of the vocal anti-smoker crowd. >;-]
It pains me a little to include this here, but after so many years of dwelling on the idea I think it’s time to let it go. In fact, I’ve grown comfortable believing that not pursuing this idea honors its essence more than actually doing anything with it. The concept was basically that “laziness” has been the prime motivator for all of humanity’s greatest inventions. Every great piece of technology we have was created because someone wanted to do less work.
Well there you have it. I hereby cast these neglected seedlings out into the interwebz, in the hopes they take root and grow. If not, that’s ok, at least I have a clean slate.